The Left

This just in from the Lunacy Coalition

Has Galloway gone stark staring bonkers?

No, I’m sure he hasn’t. But – based on the open letter he has just sent to the Home Secretary – you could be forgiven for thinking that he has.

The letter starts by disclosing that John Reid’s altercator – a senior Al Muhajiroun activist who wisely changed his name from “Trevor” to “Abu Izzadeen” – was none other than the ringleader of the group who threatened to string Galloway up during the Bethnal Green election.

This is where he really gets weird:

There are only two conceivable explanations as to how this man, at this sensitive time, was allowed to hijack your Potemkin Village performance today.

Either our police and security services are so fantastically incompetent that Bin Laden himself might have slipped in to beard you at your podium.

Or someone somewhere wanted to engineer precisely this confrontation to show you in a certain light and to portray the Muslims of Britain in the most aggressive violent and extreme way possible, as a justification for the utterly counter-productive policies you are following.

Which is it ?

Because, as you know, I am not a believer in conspiracy theories I am leaning towards the first explanation. If I am right then yet again the Metropolitan Police have proved almost comically incompetent. The sight of a small, slight, helmeted police officer being dwarfed by a giant ranting fanatical thug – talk about a thin blue line! – as all that stood between you and a violent attack will certainly have provided food for thought and encouragement to the country’s enemies. Yet again the justification for continuing in office of Sir Ian Blair must be called into question.

But if I am wrong, and this all turns out to have been some Nixonian “dirty tricks” operation..then of course the questions raised are much more profound and dangerous

Now all of this may seem “a bit mad” to those of you who aren’t familiar with Galloway’s pompous rhetorical style, or who haven’t spent much time in the company of people who are active in extreme politics.

But it isn’t, really.

The thing to remember is this:

1. People who are active in extreme politics are paranoid about plots, secret cabals, and the like. That is mostly because they don’t actually run anything, and so don’t have anything to do with their time, and therefore spend all their time plotting and organising secret cabals. Therefore they assume that everybody else is doing the same. Which, to be fair, they sometimes are.

2. Given that this is so, nothing works more effectively in extreme politics than accusing your opponents of being engaged in an enormous conspiracy. The RCP used regularly to be accused on the revolutionary left of being an MI5 front. Similarly, the extreme right thinks that both Searchlight and Combat 18 are run by the security services. Probably by the same team.

Galloway may well not be a “believer in conspiracy theories “ himself. But he appeals to a constituency whose meat and drink is the belief that things are not as they seem and that sinister forces are controlling the world. Particularly where it comes to the identities of those responsible for acts of terrorism.

So, to you and me, the sensible explanation of yesterday’s events is that the police cocked up security yesterday, and as a result, slightly touched convert got in to shout rubbish about his “Muslim brothers”.

But Galloway knows that he’ll be believed if he insinuates that Al Muhajiroun are part of some “Nixonian “dirty tricks” operation” who are deployed from time to time for the purpose of threatening Galloway’s family, to make Muslims look violent, and to provide a justification for police operations aimed at protecting us from the non-existent violent jihadists…

…who are probably MI5 agents in disguise, anyhow.

wardytron adds:

If John Reid really wanted to portray the Muslims of Britain in the most aggressive, violent and extreme way possible then he should have chosen someone other than Abu Izzadeen. My first thought on seeing his gorgeous face peering up at me in the newspaper today was “oh, him again”. Then when I read that Anjem Choudhary – he of the “Jesus is Allah’s slave” placards at the weekend – was also involved, I thought “oh, him again as well”. Far from thinking that the Muslims of Britain are aggressive, violent and extreme, I was glad to see that the number of nutters and extremists is evidently so tiny that the same names and faces are always cropping up.

David T adds

Oh, and while we’re doing “laugh at the nutter”, Bernie in the comments directs us to Abu Izzadeen’s advert for a second wife. Admittedly, it is quite possibly a fake, but either way, it is still funny. Reproduced below, because some things just ought to be *preserved*.

Abu Izzadeen

Gender Male

Date of birth 1 April 1975

Age 31 years

Marital status Married (seeking 2nd, 3rd or 4th wife)

Number of children 3

Email address

MSN Messenger

Yahoo Messenger

Last online on 12 September 2006

Profile updated on 10 September 2006

Conversation starters
Question 1 how do you feel about being a second wife

Question 2 how much quraan do you know

Question 3 sorry should be first As salam wa alaykum


Tell your friends about this person Add to my favourites Too shy? Ask HIM/HER to contact YOU

Geographical information
I was born in UK – London [ Click here for map ]

My nationality is UK

I currently live in UK – London [ Click here for map ]

City/suburb/area East London E11

Postcode E11

Visa/Residency status Citizen

Ethnic origin Other

My cast is n/a

Primary language / mother-tongue English

Other languages Arabic

My geographical background UK

Physical characteristics
Height 5’11” (180 cm)
Hair colour Black
Eye colour Hazel
Build Muscular
Glasses I do not wear glasses
Beard I have a long beard

Most attractive physical feature (my beard doesnt grow beyound a certian limit so its not really long)

My Personality
Words that describe me
Passionate, Bold, Protective, Witty, Sensitive

Best aspect of my personality
very funny loving and humble towards the believers inshallah

The thing I would most like to change about myself
Obviously a muslim doesnt ask allah to change the way he is made but my presonality inshallah i hope to make more islamic everyday inshallah

People I admire / my role-models
roles model must be the same for all muslim the messenger mohammed saw and his campanions and those I admire all those who stirve to follow the deen

The thing I would most like to change about the world
to see Islam dominate the world

How important is money in my life
Quite important

I never smoke

I have a car/motorbike driving licence

I have 2 brothers

I have 1 sister

My family
I’m a convert since 1994 i i have a older brother who also converted before me

In the social setting, I am
The life of the party

My favourite food
too many

On a typical day, I would wear
anything halal mostly (ad dafah)

Am I a convert to Islam?

How important is Islam to me
There is nothing except Islam

How practicing I am
I pray more than 5 times a day

I fast in Ramadan

I have performed Hajj, and intend to perform it again

I am

I follow
No madhab

My views on Islam
inshallah my views are in accordance with the quran and the sunnah vie the understanding of the campanions wht many wud call ahl sunnah wal jam’ah or salafiyyah etc

My Interests
My interests
I’m stuyding hafz of quran in the local masjid i read daily, i also trian at the local gym and i do kung fu. My interest centre around the deen either learning or teaching I watch jazeerah alot and i hav access to saudi tv so i get to see some of the ulam’a in the haram

My political views
quran and sunnah

I listen to music

My favourite books

Books I am currently reading
al istighataa by ibn taymieah

Newspapers / magazines I read

TV programmes I watch
al jazeerah and many debates

Previous relationships
About my current wife/wives
married with three children alhamdulillah

My ideal match
More than 16 years
Less than 40 years

My ideal match
a good sister who really feels for islam cares about the muslims becomes angry when she see the injustic towards the ummah, prays, fast, reads quraan, likes to learn about the deen, know how to enjoy herself in the halaal her age is not improtant neither her acdemic quals, as for her islamic knowledge the more she knows the more desirable she becomes

My worst match
someone whos got that east west balance rather than a islamic persona
doesnt pray or doesnt care about islam etc secularist

Plans for the future
After marriage, I would like to live
In our own place

I would like to have
More than 9 children

The most important things I would like to teach my children are
the question about the children i hav no fix number in my mind wht ever allah wills the children must be tought islam the most important thing

In the future, I would like to live
In the same city as now

My plans for the future
hijrah inshllah

Where/what/how I see myself being in 5 years’ time
abroad inshallah