Tories

Davis Davis for Freedom!

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Davis Davis has launched his new website.

Here are the Top Five Traditional British Freedoms that Davis Davis is pledged to restore, when he returns, triumphant, to Westminster:

  1. Clause 28: The Traditional Freedom of British Parents to Protect Their Children From Filthy Homosexual Deviants. Got nothing against pooves mind. Some of my best friends etc.. They stick up for me, I stick up for them.
  2. Fox Hunting: A Traditional British Pastime, Outlawed By Homosexual Communists.
  3. Speed Cameras: What is this? Nazi Germany? At least on the German autobahn you can do 150 mph!!!!.
  4. Hanging: The Freedom of a Man to be Hanged by his Lily White Neck Until He Be Dead and May God Have Mercy on his Soul.
  5. Microchips in Rubbish Bins: Even our rubbish can now be examined by neighbourhood spooks. Even in Stalin’s Russia they never stooped so low!!

Plus, the straw that broke the camel’s back:

42 Days: Jolly unfair to the ethnics. And if we send them all back, there’ll be no need for it.

These are all vital national issues that transcend party politics. At stake is my own career as a Member of Parliament, as I fight for my very future in a rock solid Tory constituency against some bloke called Craig David. This is what I, Davis Davis, am prepared to do in order to preserve our cherished Traditional British Freedom in our great country.

(Not “Liberty” mind. Filthy French word. What’s wrong with the good old Anglo Saxon “freedom”?)

Vote Davis Davis for Traditional British Freedom. Like what it used to be, in the old days!!

(via the Tory website, Pickled Politics)

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