Dress Down Friday

Green-ink Gosling goes gaga

Tony Gosling, the journalist, NUJ activist, (suspended) Green Party spokesperson and uber-Troofer has caught us out. On the 9/11 discussion list he ‘edits’ he says in response to our story revealing his homophobic statements made in his capacity as a Green Party official:

Yes, I was accurately quoted but it’s a difficult conversation to accurately record what exactly they said to me being over six months ago. I was told by the Muslim News reporter that the books depicted a positive portrayal of gay sexual relations to primary age kids and were targeted at very young children.

I am a Christian and thus have a lot in common with Muslim ideas of good educational practices. I believe all three monotheistic faiths actually worship the same God.

I am certain though that I couched my reply in the terms of ‘sounds like’ because I hadn’t actually seen the books, which I don’t see in the final piece. Personally I object to children at and up to the age of puberty being taught that homosexual relationships are ‘normal’ and portray them in a positive light. Certainly these terms should be explained to children at an appropriate age but not with a positive spin. If I had children at a school which taught such things I would see it as such an important issue that I would consider withdrawing them.

I use the term ‘gay mafia’ to describe gay rights campaigners who overstep the mark and to emphasise that no social group or community is immune to criticism. Once children reach sexual maturity as far as I’m concerned it’s their affair.

As I said on the phone I’m proud to be attacked by Harry’s Place as it is trying to make its name as a site that attacks civil liberties campaigners.

I don’t think it’s a coincidence that this criticism is timed to coincide with a documentary I’m working on exposing the police and government lies over the 7/7 London Bombings… and calling for a proper public enquiry with all the various witnesses evidence made public.

Well, what can I do but throw my hands in the air and say ‘it’s a fair cop, Tone’. When news of your documentary reached the Harry’s Place offices on the Embankment, I can now reveal there was some panic. After Miss Lucy Lips, our receptionist, brought in the Telex, I remember David T went pale and Brownie had to sit down until his batman could administer a stiff brandy. Made of sterner stuff, I immediately pulled myself together, wiped away my tears, and took charge of the situation. “What would Harry do?” I asked myself.

To this day I don’t know how I had the presence of mind to do what I did next. I lunged at the video conferencing unit and as it hummed into life, I knew that my decision had been the right one. Soon Gene flickered into view, and with the reassuring sight of the Potomac behind him, it seemed things would turn out okay. The game was not up yet.

“Call Tatchell in from the cold,” barked Gene. “Get him to do a number on this pesky Gosling character,” he ordered. “Marcus can make the usual arrangements.” And it was done.

Just then, the Harry’s Place chief of security, Graham, came in. Gesturing at two figures pacing in the hall, he sighed: “Gordon’s here and he’s got Blair with him. Shall I ask them in?”. Brownie nodded and David T muttered “yeah, whatever”.

But I realised that if the PM had Blair in tow, things must be very serious indeed. “Where the hell have you been!?” shrieked Gordon in a voice that resembled a school ma’m surprised by a mouse. “The news of Gosling’s plans to make a documentary have been buzzing around newsrooms for hours already and you haven’t sent me my instructions. I had to busk it on Sky News and really do hope I haven’t made a bodge of it! You chaps can’t put me in this position again!”

Turning to Sir Ian, Gordon waved his hand in the air. “Tell them,” he hissed.

“The police and government lied over the 7/7 London Bombings,” said Sir Ian.

“Don’t waste our time!!” thundered Gene over the video link. “We already fucking know that! Who do you think warned the Israeli ambassador not to use the Tube that morning? That’s not the issue! We have to deal swiftly with this Gosling documentary before it’s on fucking Panorama!”

It was then that I spotted Gosling’s remarks in the press and I thought “bingo”. We’ll get the Gay Mafia to do our dirty work. They’ll discredit Gosling, just as they do all other staunch civil libertarians like Stephen Green and Beenie Man.

And it would have worked too. Except for one thing: Gosling is a smart guy. He saw through these machinations immediately and posted his conclusions on a 9/11 Troof discussion list occasionally spidered by Google. Now everybody knows. Dammit! It was so perfect.

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